Failure is Inevitable

The topic of failure brings up lots of feelings. People often assume that failure is not an option, like we are all capable of choosing to fail or not to fail. Being afraid to fail is a little like being afraid to step out the door in the morning; everyday comes no matter how prepared you are just like failure is inevitable no matter how prepared you are for the day ahead.This pressure to never fail is, in a way, a failure. Not just to ourselves but to those around us. 

Failing has always been a struggle of mine. I used to desperately cling to being perfect and doing everything I could to ensure that I would never fail at school, at dance, in a job, in relationships. Let me tell you: it is an exhausting way of living. When I finally accepted that I am not perfect, that I will fail many times in my life, and that I do things wrong; life got a little easier. 

I truly believe that learning how to fail is an important life lesson. When something is inevitable, isn’t it best to learn how to handle it head on rather than hide from it? There is a way to accept failure and a way to move past that failure. Not just for ourselves but for those around us, because we not only fail ourselves but occasionally others. It seems that so few of us have learned this lesson which can make it difficult to accept failure in those around us. 

Let me tell you the lesson learned here is grace. Grace is the reason we are capable of accepting failure and how we can move past failure. When we remember that everyone fails and that we are made imperfectly, it is much easier to fail with grace rather than fail with a temper. 

This is a lesson that should be past on to our children. Learning graceful failure as a child is easier than to live our lives trying to be perfect until we run out of steam. Children are so resilient and capable of bearing more than they are given credit for. They learn from the adults in their lives what is acceptable and what is not. If a child is told over and over that failure is not an option, they learn to live in a constant state of anxiety. On the flipside, if a child is taught that they will be shown grace when failing, then they will learn to show grace to themselves and others. 

I pray that this philosophy of expecting and accepting failure in life will trickle down to our children and influence others in our lives. Teaching children how to fail with grace is not something that many people think about, I know I never did until I noticed how hard some kids take it when they fail. Especially with our new age philosophy of allowing every child to ‘win’ in sporting events. This idea of everyone winning only leads to disappointment in later life because we can’t all win all the time. But win children are given the opportunity to fail, they are being shown that it happens. Everyone loses. Everyone fails. Everyone also recovers, moves on, and learns from their mistakes. Failure is always an option, sometimes an inevitable option that can’t be helped. 

As fall approaches and schedules get loaded up with games, competitions, tests, and other activities let us remember grace. Grace in failure for ourselves, for our children, and for everyone else in our lives.

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