Why We Are Not Against Disney Princesses

    Just the words “Disney princess” brings up all sorts of nostalgic feelings for me. I have been a handful of princesses, currently own the majority of their movies, and several dolls for my daughter. The idea of being a princess has always been an ideal that I have never shied away from. Imagining myself as a princess, in a far away kingdom, awaiting a prince to love….I mean it brings up such positive emotions! I even like the idea of having a cute little critter to talk to about my problems and dreams. So it always saddens me when people go on the attack against Disney princesses. 

    Everyone has their own opinions about this idea of Disney princesses. I have heard it all: they dress inappropriately, they change for boys, they’re boy obsessed, they’re disobedient, always waiting around for someone else to save them, among many other criticisms. These are my thoughts that I have developed over the years on why I am not just ok with Disney princesses, but why I fully support the enjoyment of all things Disney princess.

     My first argument to all of the criticism has always been: what’s wrong with a little fantasy? We watch our children grow and learn through the power of play and imagination. So when we take away an innocent idea like Disney princesses, we are actually causing unhealthy ideas about what is inappropriate versus appropriate content. Generations of child researchers have studied how pretending is not only necessary but crucial for children to express themselves. There is nothing wrong with wearing a sparkly dress or a crown while pretending to be a princess. When we criticise our children for what they like or what they want to pretend, we teach them that they are wrong. When we criticise, we teach them they aren’t actually allowed to express themselves in a way that they feel comfortable. We never tell boys they can’t pretend to be knights or kings but we constantly preach that girls shouldn’t want to be a princess or queen. That is what we call a double-standard and I for one am not comfortable with that discrepancy. 

     My second argument for why we should allow Disney princesses to be viewed is because they promote healthy relationships. Hear me out: healthy boundaries and creating lasting relationships is something that most grown adults still struggle with. When I watched the Little Mermaid, I was never distracted by her bikini, I was distracted by how Flounder and Sebastian worked together to try to help her make positive choices. Sure she goes against their wishes, but they continue to support her through the choice she made. When I watch Aladdin, I am not looking at how Jasmine wears a two-piece outfit, I was watching how she made the choice to reject Aladdin after she finds out he lied about who he was. I don’t know about you, but that takes a bold person to tell someone to go away after developing feelings for them. These princesses make decisions and face the consequences, good and bad, for which they take full responsibility. 

     My last argument is for those that complain that princesses wait around for someone to save them. To this I always ask, “Have you ever even watched a Disney movie?” The princesses I know and love have all worked hard to save themselves, their friends, and their family from terrible situations. The majority of the princesses learn how to save themselves on their journeys of self-discovery. Moana, Elsa, Tiana, Pocahontas, Rapunzel, Belle to name just a few, all learn what’s important to them and how to save themselves and the people they care about. Sure there is Snow White and Sleeping Beauty who were cursed and forced to wait for a kiss to awake but they chose to run away from the lives they were living in order to feel free and discover the truth. If I had been lied to and abused for most of my life, I would have run away too! Every time a princess chooses to chase a life where they can dictate the rules, I praise them for being brave enough to journey into the unknown, to take a healthy risk to discover who they are. Without these journeys, they would not discover all that they can achieve alone but also with the people they care about. 

    This may not have changed your mind and you may not agree with my points for why we allow Disney princesses in our home. What I hope is that maybe, you have a new viewpoint, maybe some new ways of viewing some of the beloved stories that are told. As always, what is right for one family is not always right for another. Make the choices that you are most comfortable with but I hope you do so without criticizing the child that shows an interest. We can criticize an ideal or an image but we should never criticize the child.

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