They insist they care about me, but it doesn't feel that way. We've read all the marriage books we can find, but my partner doesn't do the exercises. They must not care, right? If they did they would use "I" statements. They would speak my love language. They would...
Ever been stuck here? Or maybe your partner seems stuck there but things seem fine to you. This is what makes relationships so difficult. The good news is Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy or EFT has results like no other couples therapy approach. EFT has been studied extensively, and strong scientific evidence proves that it works. 70-75% of couples experience change, and 90% of couples are significantly improved. This is compared to other therapeutic models which have closer to 20% effectiveness. Follow-up studies conducted with those who participated in Emotionally Focused Therapy show that the positive effects of the treatment continue for years after the therapy ends. That means once couples successfully complete EFT they KEEP GETTING BETTER.
A common rebuttal I hear around the effectiveness of marital counseling is when people are afraid they are too far gone. EFT even has research around couples with trauma and couples who get violent (in some circumstances) and still shows improvement.
The next common rebuttal is when people have had marriage therapy before and had a bad experience. The unfortunate truth is many people provide marriage counseling that are not licensed clinicians and/or they do not have training in couples counseling. This is heartbreaking because when you entrust something as significant as your relationship to a professional you trust them to be equipped. At Fowler Family Therapy-this is our specialty. So if you haven't been through EFT-let's give it another try.
Ever been stuck here? Or maybe your partner seems stuck there but things seem fine to you. This is what makes relationships so difficult. The good news is Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy or EFT has results like no other couples therapy approach. EFT has been studied extensively, and strong scientific evidence proves that it works. 70-75% of couples experience change, and 90% of couples are significantly improved. This is compared to other therapeutic models which have closer to 20% effectiveness. Follow-up studies conducted with those who participated in Emotionally Focused Therapy show that the positive effects of the treatment continue for years after the therapy ends. That means once couples successfully complete EFT they KEEP GETTING BETTER.
A common rebuttal I hear around the effectiveness of marital counseling is when people are afraid they are too far gone. EFT even has research around couples with trauma and couples who get violent (in some circumstances) and still shows improvement.
The next common rebuttal is when people have had marriage therapy before and had a bad experience. The unfortunate truth is many people provide marriage counseling that are not licensed clinicians and/or they do not have training in couples counseling. This is heartbreaking because when you entrust something as significant as your relationship to a professional you trust them to be equipped. At Fowler Family Therapy-this is our specialty. So if you haven't been through EFT-let's give it another try.
What is Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy?
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Couples therapy has traditionally focused on skills to improve communication. However, this has often been unhelpful because the portion of our brain that stores that information is offline when we feel attacked, threatened, or disconnected. It certainly has its place, but it can leave people feeling frustrated. What makes EFT different is rather than telling you what to do differently, it deals with what causes you to have the response that can cause difficulties in the first place. This has revolutionized couples therapy.
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“The greatest gift a parent has to give a child—and a lover has to give a lover—is emotionally attuned attention and timely responsiveness.”
― Sue Johnson
― Sue Johnson